When Life Intervenes

I am driven by schedules and to do lists.

The sense of accomplishment I feel when everything goes according to schedule and the last item is crossed off my list is like a runner's high as they push through the wall and run that last mile.  It is indeed a beautiful feeling.

When real life intervenes throwing off my schedule and preventing me from finishing my list, I get frustrated and angry.  It doesn't take much to ruin my day.

Sometimes it is from bad choices on my part. I have a bad habit of sitting down for "just a few minutes" on line or to watch a show I DVRed the night before and lose track of time. Hours later, I am behind schedule and angry.

Sometimes it is from necessity.  A doctor's appointment. A veterinarian appointment. An excessively long phone call. A 120 mile round trip to the commissary for the big grocery shopping once a month. Errands that must be run. A volunteer opportunity. A Bible study. A conference. A lunch meeting.

The list of distractions, of life, is endless.  And endlessly frustrating.

It is also indicative of a good life. We have a home. We have clean water, indoor plumbing. Electricity. Food. Phones. The freedom to come and go at will - to another city, to a Bible study, to meet with friends.

I recently realized something very important.  My sense of frustration, my anger when things go off schedule, is an attitude problem.

I have a bad attitude when things don't go my way. I blame everyone and everything for upsetting me. Rather than recognize my many blessings, I focuse on the negative.

So what if I had a long phone call. I got to talk with someone important in my life. That is a blessing. So what if they said something that upset me. I don't have to let it ruin my day. It is my choice how I react to what they said. 

Easier said than done. But, I'm a work in progress. I'm taking it one day at a time. Some days I take it an hour at a time. That's okay. Change is hard. Internal change is harder. It's worth the time and energy it will take.  I'm sure of it.

Do you deal with becoming easily frustrated too when your day doesn't go according to schedule? How do you cope? What helps you?  My coping mechanisms are music, prayer and deep cleaning.

And coffee. Lots of coffee. Speaking of which, my cup is empty. Time to pour more.